It’s not what you look like. It’s really not. I mean, it helps, but at the end of the day, no one wants to be around a horrible person.
As 2019 is coming to an end, and new things are on the horizon for me, a lot is going on for me, and for everyone around me, it seems.
For some reason, I’m finding myself continually reminding myself that I am enough these days. There is a part of me that wants to feel comfortable and safe instead of moving on and growing. It has to do with my up levelling for sure. New people in my life, new relationships I am cultivating and building, creative work that feels good, a whole new leadership journey I’m taking overseas for ten months, I mean, it’s a lot. I’ve never been here before in this way, and even though it feels SOOOOOO good, I’m terrified. Why?
Well, part of being a human being means that we have voices that like to tell us what to do and keep us safe. It’s part of our humanity. I’ve listened to mine for years, and felt like crap for so long, to the point where I finally said, I’ve had enough of my own “B.S.”
I burnt out because I was always telling myself I wasn’t good enough. I wasn’t good enough for the job, the money, the guy, the friends I wanted around me, the family and community I wanted to build. So I sat the sidelines and made choices that weren’t always aligned with who I was as a person or what my heart desired. It took me a TON of courage to step out onto the playing field. It’s easy to sit on the sidelines. More comfortable than being on the field/arena, and playing the game of life. You can most certainly sit on the sidelines your whole life if you choose, and you can still have a job, marriage, house, kids and all that jazz, but it doesn’t promise you happiness.
You can also choose to focus on all things that make you feel like crap.
- I NEED to get out of my own way
- I need a kick in the ass now
- I’m not making enough money, and I should be
- I’m spending too much money
- I give too much of my time away, and I get nothing in return
- I should be farther along in my business and career by now
- I’m too old for this
- I don’t know how to love myself
- I need to fix this thing within me and get to the bottom of it
- I’m too much of a people pleaser and need to set some boundaries
- I need to make money
- I need to be with someone now; I’m getting old
- I need to be out there and dating, otherwise, SINGLEFORLIFE
- I should save for a home; instead, that’s more important
- I should have been kinder to that person last night
- I should have asked for his/her phone number, WHY DIDN’T I?!?
- I shouldn’t have asked for his/her number
- I should be thinking about having babies, not travelling
- I should have known better before I made that decision
- I always knew it…but I did it anyway!
- I have no clue what I’m doing…
blah blah blah
For some reason, at the end of the year, it can be hard to stomach for a lot of us. We start to take a look at what happened over the past year, and we think we haven’t accomplished everything we wanted to, and we feel horrible instead of celebrating or permitting ourselves to celebrate. December is an expensive month, with all the consumerism going on, end of year sales, Santa, gifts, Holiday parties etc. We tend to feel a little burnt out by it all, and rightfully so, it’s a lot. We are stressed.
If there is one thing I’d like to share with you during this time of year is this – say to yourself, “I am enough.” Even when you don’t feel it, say it to yourself anyways. When the voice inside of you takes over and says things to you that you should be doing instead, say “I am enough” again and again. Learn to be your biggest ally to yourself. Learn to celebrate your failures and your successes. It’s all designed to teach you something during your time here on Earth, and if you aren’t paying attention, time will pass you by.
You are enough, exactly as you are, in this moment. I don’t care about what car you drive, what house you have or don’t have, what job you have or don’t, what school you went to or not, what your salary is like, or even that you are feeling crapy right now. It’s about who you are as a human being, and often, underneath all of that stuff, people are pretty freaken amazing, and they aren’t told that enough.
Tell someone this Holiday season how great they are and how much you love them. Acknowledge someone for who they are and say a quality you see in them. It can start with you are – insert quality here. You are brave. You are compassionate. You are loving. I use this exercise all the time in my workshops, and it does wonders.
I want to wish you a Happy Holiday Season. I’m not sure how many more newsletters you will receive from me in 2019, so until then, I wish you a wonderful time with friends + family.
Much love, Sonia, CPCC
Want to join my community of awesome people? Find out what I’m leading in 2020 below.
P.S. If you are interested in hiring a Coach, taking yourself to the next level for real this time, and are curious about working with me, click here and let’s have a chat about what it looks like!