How do people view you?

I’ve been reflecting on this hardcore over the past 12 months. I think its partly due to the fact because I’ve been taking a look at my impact and noticing what my impression is on others.  In turn, taking a look at how other people make me feel and their effects on me are. 

Man, it’s like shining a bright light on the thing you fear the most and taking a look at what’s underneath. It’s the reason why people don’t want to hire coaches because they are utterly afraid of what might be revealed. It’s a scary thing for people. The ultimate question, “Who am I” outside of everything external is hard to understand and make sense of it all. It’s confusing because we live in a world where achievement and accomplishment are more important than being as we are. 

The truth is, my impact can be pretty cutthroat. It’s a force of nature. It’s the force that reveals your ultimate truth, and, stands by you calling your greatness forth. I do not allow people to play small who come into my world. I did it for years, and it got me to places I didn’t like to be. I listen to people; I’m a safe space for people because I don’t bring judgement to the room or the conversation. I mean, I’m not perfect, and neither are you. People receive enough judgement in their daily lives from the people around them.

In a conversation a few weeks ago while I was in Cuba, there was a guy flirty with me. He asked me when my last relationship was, and I said, “That’s a little too soon to be asking that question, I met you 30 seconds ago.” His response was, “Baggage.” I said, “Interesting response, and you’ve just judged me, and you know nothing about me.” He didn’t have anything clever to say to that. 

My impact has shifted recently because my feedback loop is different today than it was five years ago. 

What’s a feedback loop? 

The feedback loop, which I discovered in the book called, Think or Sink, is about what feedback are you receiving from your outer world, external sources sort of speak. This includes people who give input whether there was permission granted from you or not, and can consist from your family, your friends, your partner, your close relationships, paid professionals, people you see on the street, people you meet at the mall, etc. Think about all the opportunities you interact with people and how they see you and react/respond to you. It can tell you a lot about yourself, whether it is true or not.

  • Are people pulling away from you and you don’t know why? 
  • Are people drawn to you in a magnetic way?
  • Do you get attached to people easily? 
  • Do you view your friendships as people who should listen to your sorrow and woes?
  • Are you wondering what you did wrong?
  • Are people at the grocery store who cash you out nice to you?
  • What’s your relationship like with your manager?
  • Are you dragging around baggage from your previous and past life?
  • Are you in constant worry and anxiety about the future?
  • How much money do I need, when am I going to pay off my mortgage, how am I going to get out of this job, when am I going to find “the one.”
  • Do you have trouble keeping relationships?
  • Do you hear from the people around you call you out on the “flawed” parts of you instead of the good?
  • Is the feedback you receive a good representation of the who you are? What’s the truth?

People can smell your beliefs and fears from far away. It’s all about your energy and what frequency you are putting out there.

What do you think about the most and what you are working towards? 

Ever hear someone say, “I don’t really know what I want.”? I’ve been there so many times before. It’s scary to claim a goal or to confidently say, “This is who I am and what I want.” It’s a noble act to say with conviction who you are and what you stand for.  It’s vulnerable, scary, and the reason why people say, “I don’t know what I want,” is that they are afraid of it, and, a part of them doesn’t believe they’ll get it anyways. I genuinely believe that we all have the answers we seek within ourselves, and it’s time to listen to that voice instead of the many voices telling you what you should be focusing your life on. 

I see it all the time. So many people I know fell into their relationships, jobs, money (inheritance), friendships, houses, etc. They are not taking a look at what was going on underneath all of it — not focusing on their purpose in life, the meaning of their life, the author of their story.  Underneath all that drives the fundamental problem we all suffer from, which is, I am not worthy, deserving or good enough to have everything I want in life. It’s just not meant for me. It’s not possible because I come from this family, or this socio-economic background, or this part of the world. There is always an excuse. This is why we pick certain partners and jobs because going after the real deal is far too scary and a lot of work. 

So we act out in ways that are not aligned with who we are and our intrinsic values. It’s kind of chaotic, messy, and totally imperfect. Life isn’t meant to be perfect, and it is intended to be enjoyable. You are expected to experience what you want to experience because that’s why you are here on this Earth. 

I’m doing a workshop on May 4th called, What’s Your Impact. It’s an opportunity to explore and play with your impact.  It will be a lot of fun, and there will be games and exercises calling you forth to step into your power. This is a self-exploratory workshop designed to be entirely experiential consisting of discussion, activities, opportunities to be seen and heard. I’ll create a safe space for you to dive into connecting more to your inner leader and what impact you have on others and the world. It’s an excellent opportunity to play and experience real-time growth and self-awareness. 

How do people see you? How does a coach see you? What impact do you have on others?

If you are a curious person like me and are tired of the results you are getting in your life, your job, your relationship, your money, your friends, your house, your community, then I have just the thing for you.

Let’s dive deep on Saturday, May 4th starting at 12:30 PM at The Village Hive Coworking Space in Markham. I’ll be there to stand beside you and call forth your greatness with kindness, respect and a little bit of sass in between 😉

There is nothing to be afraid of because you are on a journey of self-discovery to realize your superhuman powers and what is most important to you so you can start to live your life. 

Click here for more info on the workshop and to grab your tickets now! Early bird tickets are on sale until April 15th.


xoxo, Sonia
Leadership Coach

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