Me (Sonia) in relationships
This was a perspective in my last coaching session with my leadership + mentor coach to take a look at and reflect on before our next session, which is Thursday by the way!
I brought up in our session how I’m struggling with my responses to some of the relationships I have in my life. What I didn’t realize at the time was how me in relationships also affect my business + coaching practice. I thought it was LIMITED to my friendships and love interests. NOPE. There’s more to it than that, juicy isn’t it?
It expands beyond my personal life and into my career, my passions, my purpose in life, my way of being in the world and ultimately, my impact.
What did I learn about me in relationships?
I tend to ignore my intuition nudge when I am listening to someone speak. I have a question to ask, or I need to set a boundary with that person, or I am noticing how I feel about the work, and I am becoming more and more deflated, and I say nothing. I let it fester. I allow others to dictate the terms of our relationship. I compromise my values and my time in the process to have the honour of being with this person. I say it’s okay, and you need this relationship. It’s okay, you are building a relationship, and you need to put in the extra work up front. If you say no to this person, you’ll have no one else around and you’ll be alone.
I have the belief that this is who I need to be in relationships for them to work. You need to put in a ton of work up front to keep things. To take things. To have things. To survive in the world. The world is an ugly place.
“Stop wanting more. Stop asking for more. Stop going after what you want.” Inner gremlin repeats.
You are privileged to be able not to work a job and do your own thing.
You need to focus on essential things like owning a house and your RRSPs.
You shouldn’t buy expensive things because it’s not worth the money and you will be locked into maintaining it with more money.
You need to find a partner. You are in your thirties now, you know?
Be afraid. Live in fear. Life gets more complicated. Life gets more challenging. As you age, you’ll have less and less time. You need to think about starting a family. You don’t have enough experience yet. You don’t have enough education yet. You need to lose weight. Your growing white hair, dye it. Do you have lines on your forehead? Get botox.
What kind of world are we living in? With messages like this on the daily, I can see why the world is the way it is.
This morning I met a lovely woman at the Doctors’ office. We connected as I commented on her magazine of choice which was Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. She laughed and said, “Yeah I’ll take this kind of news rather than the news I hear on the daily” She kept going. Kept wanting to share with me how the news is disheartening to her and she can’t watch it anymore. She rather choose a story that has little significance to her than the reality. By the end of this interaction, she said, “There are still a lot of good people in the world.” I looked at her and said, “Absolutely, there are a TON.”
Do you see my impact?
We are hurting, in pain, and don’t know what to do about it.
It’s hard to keep up and live up to the pressure.
I want mutually beneficial friendships.
I want a mutually beneficial and respectful love life.
I want to live in a world where we replace hate with love.
I want that world to trust, to have faith, to be kind to one another (thank you Ellen) and I want each person to believe that they are deserving and worthy.
I want work that is fulfilling, brings me joy, means something, and ultimately, empowers the world to love more and live life with expansion, growth, full capacity and range.
I want to visit new cities and meet people because I want new perspectives and connection.
I want to gift myself as much as I can while I am on this planet because I deserve it.
My life has meaning, and I want to give myself all the experiences I desire.
Here’s what I want for you:
You are deserving as you are. You don’t need more, and you don’t need less. Exactly as you are today in this moment, is enough. In fact, more than enough. This is my longing for you…to believe in YOU…regardless of what you know is true.
What I am committing to myself in the next few months:
1. Saying yes only when I mean it
2. Speaking my authentic truth when something doesn’t sit right with me
3. Letting others know where I am at with no regrets
4. Saying NO when I think I should say Yes
5. When I feel the pit of my stomach go upside down, I need to set a boundary with someone
6. Articulate what’s important to me regardless of the impact on others
7. Sit here and know that I am deserving, good enough, and worth it
What are you committing to this year?
I want to know all about it. Together, we can come up with a customized plan of action for how to live your life in 2019. Step into your inner leader and be the person you were meant to be in the world. The world is in need of your authentic and fully expressed self.
Who do I work with?
I work with women who are ready to step into their authentic leadership, let go of what’s been holding them back from going after their big fat dreams, and clear out what no longer serves them. Who would you be if you didn’t have all that weight anymore? Who would you be with all that freedom?
Let’s find out –> click here to book a discovery call because, before February 15th, I’m offering my six-month leadership coaching package at a reduced rate while I embark on coach certification. As a certified professional coach and having this designation in my tool kit, I will do more than activate your inner leader, and you will be leading from a new place, the place that’s within you waiting to unleash itself.
For more details about my six-month coaching program at a reduced rate UNTIL FEB 15th ONLY, book some time with me here.